Monday, February 10, 2014

Mondays

Man there is something about Mondays that really sucks the life out of me. On Friday I was so amped about yoga and feeling good (and I fit into a skirt that didn't fit a month ago, HOORAY) and the weekend was nice and relaxed and I wake up this morning and I just...cannot be bothered.
I know this is all very first world problem. I'm unemployed, so it's not like I have to drag myself to work, I know that, but sometimes the monotony of being a homemaker (sorry, barf) gets to me. Mondays are perhaps the worst because the weekend is so nice. I get to hang out with Mr. Idiot and we watch 30 Rock and drink wine and goof around and Saturday is break night, so sometimes we have cake, and we can sleep in and make lazy breakfasts. I love the weekends. And Mondays suck because I know I've got five more days of being in the house by myself, just trying to fill up the time. I make schedules for myself during the day to keep me busy so I don't go nuts just sitting on the couch. I know some of you reading this are thinking that I'm crazy and you'd kill for a chance to laze around, but I've been unemployed for a long time. Far, far too long, and trust me, the "staycation" gets old really quick.
Normally I wake up and I'm looking forward to doing yoga and making breakfast and all the stuff I do in the morning but not today. It is grey outside and I am feeling listless. I barely made it through the yoga this morning, and I've got none of that lovely zen buzz I have afterwards. I just want to go back to bed.
I suppose days like this are normal, people have off days and days they don't want to work out and eat right and it's So. Much. Easier just to sit on the couch and nap. But I guess that's the hard part is not letting yourself do that. It's easy to be healthy and active when it feels awesome and you feel great and energized, the part that's really work are the days you don't want to get up and work, when you can barely drag yourself out of bed, let alone onto a treadmill or a yoga mat.
This is a work in progress, being fit and getting back into being a healthy person. For a long time I really was a couch potato with no energy, and it seems logical that sometimes I'll be tempted to slip back into that.
But I do feel a million times better, days like today excepted. I've read online that people do paleo and get these amazing results just from changing their diet. I haven't been that way. I'm more or less the same size, I don't own a scale so I don't know how much I weigh but it's probably about the same. So the weight loss isn't the reason I'm doing this, though the p90x should help with that. I just want to feel better about myself and about my body. Even if my actual body doesn't change, the way I feel about it is changing. That, for me, is the most important thing, changing the way I perceive my own body. Just the feeling that I'm treating it better and working it harder has done wonders for me.
But I still hate Mondays.