Coconut Mushroom pork with bacon turnip greens

So, most boring title ever, but whatever. It was super yummy. And today was ANOTHER snow day, which can I just take a minute and say what the hell North Carolina, it is halfway through February, it is time for snow days to be over and done with. It snowed nearly three inches in one day, and it's supposed to snow more tomorrow and Thursday. I do love the snow and it's so nice because AZ NEVER gets snow in the Valley, so it's a nice change, but come on weather gods. It's halfway to March, isn't it supposed to be getting to spring now? Like...soon?
Whatever, snow or no snow, I tackled p90x yoga again today, and I am quite proud to say that I made it through a whole hour of that crazy stuff today. And let me tell you, I am indeed hella sore. But, I feel good and like I worked hard and my butt is on fire guys. On. Fire. But in the best way. So, I'll be back at it again tomorrow, and the goal is to actually finish a session finally. Maybe tomorrow. My butt hurts today.
Anyway.
Here's some tasty pork-stuffs to eat when  your butt hurts, like mine does.

Mushroom and Coconut pork with bacon turnip greens.

What you'll need:
1/2 yellow onion, diced
10 oz mushrooms (or just a whole package sliced, that works too)
2 tbsp coconut oil
4 tbsp minced garlic
1 cup coconut milk
1 cup chicken broth
Big handful of turnip greens
3 slices of bacon, sliced

So, the vast majority of this cooking is done while you are in the living room, so that is a definite bonus for me.
Anyway, the steps for you to follow are thus:

Liberally season you pork chops with salt and pepper and cook in the coconut oil in a deep skillet on medium high heat for about four minutes per side, or until it gets brown on the outside.

Take the pork chops out and put them aside.

If you have to put more coconut oil in the skillet, you can, but either way, saute your onions and mushrooms in the same pan for another couple of minutes, or until the onions start to go transparent.

Pour the chicken broth into the skillet, let it come to a boil, take the heat to med-low and put the pork chops back in the skillet.

Add 2 tbsp of mince garlic, and cover the skillet and let it simmer for ten minutes, in the meantime start the turnip greens.

Take a pan, melt the other tbsp coconut oil and put in your turnip greens. Cover and let the leaves wilt for a few minutes. 

Bacon is my BFF

This meal, unfortunately is NOT a one pot meal by any means. There were like three pots going while I made this. It was delicious, but make sure you've got a lovely husband who is going to do the cleanup for you.

Add your bacon, and 2 tbsp minced garlic to the turnip greens and re-cover.

While the turnip greens are wilting, after the ten minutes are up, add in the cup of coconut milk to the pork chops and let it simmer. Bring the heat up to med-high and simmer, covered, for another ten minutes.

Turn the turnip greens down to med-low and let them heat up until the pork chops are done.

Once the turnip greens are done and the ten minutes are up, you're ready to serve.

I blended my turnip greens in a food processor for a few seconds before I plated, just to break up the turnip greens (which are ENORMOUS).
This stuff was super good, and Mr. Idiot was very disappointed that there wasn't more turnip greens to eat. That's usually a good sign, when Mr. Idiot is bummed there isn't more of it.

I'll admit, this is kind of an intensive meal...there were lots of pots going and lots of checking to make sure everything was going alright, but it was delicious and totally worth it.

Winter wonderland dinner to warm your belly

It has been COLD here in North Carolina guys. And I know that some of you must be from the ice-swept lands of Kansas or Montana where there are like ten inches of snow a day, but this is the South. It is not supposed to be snowy here. We got three inches of snow on Tuesday. Three inches! The high was like 20 degrees. Our house and my wardrobe are not equipped to handle those kind of temperatures.

We did build a tiny snowman and make snow angels though. That was pretty rad, I can't remember the last time I actually played in the snow.

So, Mr Idiot and I needed to whip up something nice and hearty to keep us toasty. And so we did. The only problem is that my go-to recipes for heart meals almost always involve potatoes or pasta, both of which we're not allowed to eat. So, we came up with a solution.

This recipe is a personal favorite because it utilizes what I think is one of the world's least recognized vegetables, the parsnip. I absolutely adore parsnips. My dad makes them at Christmas and he roasts them and they are crispy and crunchy and just the right amount of sweet and omg. So. Fricken. Good. So when I saw them on special I couldn't help but buy some. Mr. Idiot had never even heard of a parsnip before, so this was the perfect introduction.

Baked salmon and root veggie hash

This is super easy to whip up, and following the theme of most of my recipes lately, was a very efficient way to clean out some straggler vegetables in preparation for the Great Fridge Restocking of 2014.

4 parsnips, peeled

3 carrots, peeled

4 strips of bacon, diced.

3 fillets of salmon

Ground sage

salt and pepper

Dried lemon peel

I found some asparagus spears at the bottom of the crisper that look like they were about to be done, so we grilled those up as well, but you can add any other veggies to this as you like.

Line an oven tray with tin foil and preheat the oven 375 degrees.

We didn't really measure out the seasoning, just add enough until the top of the fillet is pretty well covered. If I had to guess I'd say on each fillet ½ tbsp sage, ½ tbsp lemon peel, and be liberal with the salt and pepper.

Pop in the oven and bake for 40 minutes, or until the salmon is flaky.

Peel your carrots and parsnips and then grate them into a bowl. I just used the peeler and peeled strips off until I had little nubby centers left.

In a large skillet over med-high heat, melt coconut oil and add carrots and parsnips. Stir the hash occasionally.

After about seven minutes on the heat, add in the bacon. Stir until the bacon is cooked. Once your bacon is done, lower the heat and leave the hash in the skillet to keep it warm.

Once the hash was done cooking, we grilled the asparagus with a bit of salt and pepper. 

Cut the woody ends off the asparagus. Ours were perhaps on their last legs, so we cut most of the ends off and had the spears. 

Plate, and serve. Hey presto, delicious hearty noms.

 

Breakfast of champions

Breakfast is a pretty easy meal for paleo, because it's basically bacon and eggs every morning, no sweat. Plus, that much protein in the morning means I'm not hungry again during the day until nearly three. As much as I love bacon and eggs in all its permutations (soft-boiled eggs, hard boiled eggs, scrambled, fried) sometimes it's nice to mix things up. I've been experimenting with paleo pancakes, but with zero success so far. There's tons of recipes online, but mine just turn into mushy puddles. 

So, we're sticking with egg-based recipes so far, but I'll keep experimenting with non-egg breakfast foods. 

Anyway, this Mexican inspired brekkie is an amalgamation of a few recipes I found online, and whatever the hell was in my fridge. I think I'm getting the hang of throwing things together and getting pretty solid results. 

I made this recipe again this weekend for Mr. Idiot, and improved it vastly, but...I didn't take any pictures for you, so use your damn imagination. 

Breakfast of Champions

This recipe kept me full right up until dinner last Sunday, and then again for breakfast and lunch the next day. So it will (in theory) feed four.

1 sweet potato, diced

1/2 bell pepper diced

1/2 onion, diced

2 cloves of garlic, minced (or 1 tbsp pre-minced stuff)

2 tbsp coconut oil

handful of spinach (Or any other filler you like, spring onions, broccoli, anything you like)

2 roma tomatoes (you can use any tomatoes, this is just what was in the fridge)

7 eggs

Bacon. As I've said before, you can NEVER have too much bacon, I made 4 strips each

Chop everything, all the veggies get diced up and thrown in together.

Once the veggies are chopped, add coconut oil to large skillet, and add garlic over medium heat. 

Once the pan is hot and the garlic starts to brown add in chopped vegetables. Don't add the spinach yet. 

Once the sweet potatoes are soft to the touch (Use a spoon, not your hands, dur) add in the spinach and lower the heat to medium low. 

Crack the eggs directly into the skillet and mix everything together until it's all a nice big lumpy mess. 

Serve with bacon and some sliced and salted avocado. Feel free to add salsa, hot sauce, whatever you like. 

Alternatively, substitute the bacon for pork sausage mixed in with the eggs. I added two big spoonfuls of salsa to the scramble, and it was SO MUCH better the second time around. I think the fat from the pork sausage really helped bring all the vegetable flavors out. 

So. Good. 

I'm now officially on the lookout for paleo tortillas, so I can make breakfast burritos with this lovely, delicious mess. 

Don't make this chicken salad

I didn't think salad would be a hard thing to make for dinner, but I think I was wrong.
I followed (kind of...not really) a recipe I found online, but the one I linked to yesterday was wrong. I took some parts of that recipe and other parts of a recipe that I either dreamt or lost into the abyss of my browser history and it came out...okay.

Looks pretty anyway.

Here's what I did.

Dressing:
2 tbsp lime juice
1 tbsp soy sauce
1 tbsp chili sauce
splash of peanut oil

1 chicken breast, sliced up
1 bag of  frozen "grilling veggies" from Wal-Mart (zucchini, squash, onions and red peppers)
5 mushrooms, sliced
mixed salad greens (spinach and spring mix)

I cut up the chicken into bits. I had originally intended to slice the breast in half longways, but the breasts we have left are a bit skinny for that, so I cubed-ish. I poured about 1/3 of the sauce into a pan and cooked the chicken in it, adding the frozen veggies as the chicken cooked.
In a separate pan I cooked the mushrooms with 1/2 tsp of butter until they were warm and then took them off the heat.
I put something like two handfuls of mixed salad into bowls and poured the rest of the dressing over it. There wasn't quite enough left so I made some more dressing to pour over the chicken and veggies.
Put the mushrooms on top, and then scooped the chicken/veggie mix on top of that and poured the rest of the dressing over the top.

It smelled pretty good as I was cooking, but it was VERY limey. Way too limey. I was trying to stretch out the chicken a little bit, but this wasn't a great success. Mr. Idiot seemed to like it well enough, he ate what was left in my bowl, but it was too limey and there wasn't enough difference of texture.
I don't want to give up on salad because it does help stretch the meat out, but this was no bueno. I'm thinking maybe if I get some peanut sauce and add some peanuts to the salad it'll have more crunch, and maybe less acidic lime taste. And I think the grilling veggies were a mistake. The flavor just...didn't go together. Maybe teriyaki chicken with peanuts and chili sauce.
Hrm.
Thankfully Mr. Idiot brought home chocolate cake (YAY!) with the lime juice I asked him to pick up, so neither of us went too hungry.
Hopefully tomorrow's dish goes down better.